The day the Glamazon became a LAMEazon

SUPER GNATS

I am being overtaken by gnats!! So last night after fogging again I came home cleaned up all the cans up (4 cans sprayed through out my small 768sq ft apt).  Turned on the air and fans to air it out and left to go watch the game at Fox Sports Grill (nice spot you should check it out).  When I returned I went to the bathroom…only to see what two gnats flying around like I hadn’t fumigated. I think they thought it was a happy hour!! Oh well I guess I am going to try some home remedies I found on the net.  Does anyone have any ideas? I am now being overrun with super-gnats that drink fogger like its water!

 

The Glam Gets Benched

So with out going into to details the Glamazon did something that was very unGlamazonike.  I mean like I should be on probation (not with out pay – but like on the kind of probation they put cops on when they beat people down- what’s that called suspension with pay – YEA).  I mean like I’m down -10,000 cool points, I mean like I don’t want to talk to me, I mean like I am such a LAME.  Don’t ask me who or what it was because that is not the issue the issue is that my selfish actions not only hurt some one I care about and consider to be a friend they also hurt someone who had nothing to do with the situation at all.  I feel so bad and completely ashamed about that.   I like to think I am nice but what I did nice people don’t do.  I know better and I knew better when I did what I did when you did what you did to me.  (Now really I am not trying to make light of the situation but I couldn’t help myself with that one.)  I just feel bad about it and I wish I could make things right.  The problem is there is little I can do to make it right and there is nothing I can do to justify it- I was wrong.  I will try to do what ever it is I can to make things better after but there should not have been an after.  I am so super disappointed in myself.  I pride myself on being a good friend, you know one with integrity, and one who makes sure her friends never question her loyalty or friendship, a friend who tries to give good objective opinions, a friend who accepts people, a friend who is not judgmental, you know everything I want in a friend I try to be.  So when I phuck things up royally over petty shyt I feel like a failure as a friend.  I take my friendships so serious and I just try not to be the one who is responsible for making things not work. 

 

Now, I know  there are a few things about me that I know I need to work on I’m strong willed, opinionated, stubborn, snobby at times (intelligence snob), quick tempered, impetuous, and bit of loud mouth.  I know I need to work on those things and I know I need to try to keep them in check.  I just always hoped that my good friend qualities would outweigh the stupid shyt I do from time to time.  I know better but like I said before, I sometimes let my emotions get  ahead of me and fly off the handle before I can corral them in and be like Now Monique is that really rational behavior and is that really going to help the situation. 

 

So now, here I am blogging about what a horrible friend I feel like.  It’s just that I pride myself so much of being the opposite of everything I feel I was in the moment I made my bad decision.  Well I know we all make bad decisions in friendships that hurt people, sometimes we recover from them (right Buschick?) and sometimes we don’t.  Fortunately, it seems I have always been able to recover from bad decisions made in friendships (no matter which party made them), this time I may not fare as well.  I guess I will learn from my mistakes and make sure I am never as careless with someone’s feelings as I have been recently.  They say time heals so I am just hoping with each tick of the clock  perhaps my luster my comeback and maybe my stock may rise just a tad.  I guess if it doesn’t it wasn’t that kind of friendship and that probably means that I wasn’t that great of a friend to begin with.  Well send me positive vibes and also send me some patience and wisdom (I could use them for sure!). 

 

Be EZ,

 

OG